Push Me, Pull Me

?     Ambivalent     ?

  

      The PushMe/PullMe is a
      fictional animal
      with a head at either end
       of its body.
 
The head on the left                      
faces this way  <                         
                   and the head on the right
                               faces that way  >

       ___________________________


Since each head has a mind of its own, and since each wants to go its own way, PushMe/PullMe never gets anywhere at all.  

He (or she) is an animated
example of "ambivalence":

 uncertainty caused by
incompatible inclinations.


I bet you sometimes feel like a PushMe/PullMe.   (I know I do.)  Poked in one direction ... yanked in another ... losing sleep  ... going round in circles ... worrying ... overthinking ... unable to resolve your predicament on your own.


You are of two minds (if not of two heads)
 about how to start moving forward again, and so you are stuck, stymied, blocked.  You are frustrated and you don't know what to do next.


Maybe you even believe that it's all your own fault: accusing yourself of self-sabotage, resistance, laziness, getting in your own way.  Perhaps you think can't get unstuck because you have "bad karma," or "character flaws."


But this is a serious misunderstanding!   Because you are NOT self-sabotaging, or resistant.  And you are NOT a dyed-in-the-wool heel-dragger.

NO!!! 

You are stopped in your tracks because:

  • You have a problem that you can't solve by yourself, and ...

  • within that problem there an inner conflict!

   Something in you                      
    wants to go this way  <                               ...            
       while something else in you
            wants to go thatta way  >   


What's more, although you may be aware of the part of you that is pushing, you might not be aware of the part that is pulling*.   (This is what happens when you say "I want to lose weight," and you keep on eating those potato chips.)

________________________________

And then, there's a third
problem direction:  UP ^ 

________________________________


As in, "I should pull myself UP ^ by my own bootstraps."                                         



A bootstrap is a loop of leather or cloth sewn into a boot to help you pull it up onto your leg. 


But you are not a boot!   It is an unkind, unhelpful and depressing myth that says that you should always be able to fix everything on your own ... without any help.

____________________________________


All serious life problems and issues have at least one PushMe/PullMe at its core.  But the worst PushMe/PullMe - the one which keeps you going back and forth and round and round - is the one which simultaneously orders you to:

< Get Help    and     Go It Alone >


If you hear yourself saying both  "I need support"   and  "I should do it myself"  then you are caught up in a contradiction which is keeping you stymied.

This contradiction goes: 

"Although I CAN'T
fix myself by myself,
I MUST fix myself by myself."


Aaaaaargh!  You're in a mojotivity depleting PushMe/PullMe pickle.  Caught between ...

<  a leftward moving rock               
and a    
             rightward moving hard place  >   



Fortunately, it's really not the either/or dilemma that it seems to be.  Because you can BOTH stand by yourself ... and have someone there to stand by you. 

You can find someone who will both offer you expert support - and - who will teach you how to transform your emotional, spiritual and creative life on your own.  Someone who stands WITH you as you sort things out.

___________________________________


I have been where you are now.  Torn between thinking that I have to choose between getting help or being crowned this year's Miss Go-It-Alone.  Desperately needing assistance, and fiercely clinging to my independence. 

I chose to make the change from the PushMe/PullMe falsehood to the Two-Heads-Are-Better-Than-One truth, and so have my clients. 

___________________________________


Of course, you may not be ready to make any big commitments yet.  So, here is how you can start helping yourself right away, without having to spend a dime, or commit yourself to any long-term program:

Start by clicking on
the  JOIN MY LIST  button
at the upper right hand corner
of this page.


Once you do that you will receive:

  • My 85-page RE-MOJIFY eWorkBook featuring techniques you can use to administer powerful mojo-boosting self-care as soon as you notice that your your energy is tanking, or you're feeling crummy.

  • Mojotivity -- my noozletter for bright and creative individuals who are struggling to find their way without losing their edge.
    Mojotivity is a bi-monthly eZine which is full of helpful hints, transformative stories, and easy to use techniques.

 
To to receive your RE-MOJIFY eBook, and the Mojotivity eZine, just click on the JOIN MY LIST button at the upper right hand corner of this page and get started. (And make sure to check your inbox for the email with the link to your free book!)



To arrange to chat about
the PushMe/PullMe
that's been stuckifying you,
click here.

(You'll instantly receive a form to fill out to let us know where to send your stuff.)



"Joan is a true partner, helping me at every step on my journey.  

Her eZines alone are worth
the price of admission!"

LB, events planner

_____________________


Dear Joan,  Reading
what you have
to say always deepens and strengthens my resolve,
and has helped me
to overcome personal blocks...
let go of old baggage ...
and release fears that stopped me
from achieving my
most cherished dreams.

I'm looking forward to our
free consultation,
but even before that,
I want to thank you
for your articles,
 for your generosity
and clarity.

Lilia Petrie,
Creative Arts Therapist,
Vancouver, British Columbia

________________

Joan, Though we've
never met,
I wanted to tell you
how much I enjoy
your newsletters.

Your writing style -- breezy, invitational, unpretentious,
and with a good dose
of humor, is refreshing.

  I just wanted you to know
that I am one of the silent,
appreciative audience
who enjoys your work
and writings.

Andrea Mathieson
www.ravenessences.com
Canada

________________

Joan, I used to get so many boring newsletters
in my in box that I
finally unsubsubscribed
to most of them.

What I like about
Mojotivity Matters
is that you don't send it out
until you have something really helpful to share!

I've benefited so much
from your articles.
And I've saved them all
to read again when I feel
as if my mojo is slipping.

Geralyn Taylor,
North Carolina

_________________


"Joan, You are so wonderful
and talented and filled with
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I have always felt you have
a special talent for
wonderful communication."

Sohini Genevieve
 Kreative World
Sandpoint, Idaho

________________

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you are dedicated to!

George Winsley,
Minnesota

_________________


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Once you work on a problem you can easily forget that it was a problem, because it's completely gone!"

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journalist