From Our Articles Archive

When I was twelve I had my first migraine headache.  It happened while I was trying to study, but I was doing more worrying than studying -- I had two tests the next day, I'd left studying for the last minute, and there wasn't enough time to prepare for both exams.

When the migraine came, I didn't know what it was -- I thought I was going blind. The next morning, instead of going to school, my mother rushed me to the eye doctor.  He said I needed glasses.  Meanwhile, I missed both tests.

About 3 or 4 years later, I started getting migraine headaches again, fairly regularly.
So I had my glasses checked, but they were OK.

After a while, I noticed that I always got those migraines the night before my physics exam ... and never any other time! I couldn't study because I couldn't see.  And then I did poorly on the exam. (Doing poorly was no surprise. I knew I was lousy in physics.)

But, here is the interesting thing: I was only 15 years old.  I had never heard of therapy, or of the unconscious mind.  Still, somehow a light went on, and I figured out that if I got a headache I couldn't study, and if I didn't study, I had an excuse for doing poorly. I realized that my migraine headaches were about saving face! 

Hmmmmmmmmm.

So, I designed an experiment:  I ordered myself not to have a migraine before the next test ... and I ordered myself to study hard the night before the exam, and I asked myself to remain open to whatever happened.

And look what happened:

• I didn't get a headache.
  
  
• I studied.
  
  
• I got the highest mark in the class.
  
  
• The teacher accused me of cheating, but since was the only one with the right answers, he was the one who lost face this time!
  
  
• The headaches didn't come back.
  

This was my first - and firsthand - experience of what psychologists call Secondary Gain
(a positive byproduct of an otherwise negative situation) and what I now call BURIED BENEFITS.   (I don't like to use the term Secondary Gain, because often, the benefit is the main reason for the unwanted pain or habit, and not secondary at all!)

A BURIED BENEFIT is performing a SECRET SERVICE  -- giving you a hidden, eclipsed or undetected advantage that comes from holding onto an otherwise undesirable condition.

You have a Buried Benefit if you are unknowingly holding onto ...

• symptoms of illness because it generates love or sympathy.
  
  
• physical pain because it will help win a lawsuit, or because it enables you to collect disability payments.
  
  
• excess weight because it makes you feel safe or invisible.
  
  
• anger because it masks grief or vulnerability.
  
  
• anything that keeps you from having to face situations that you would rather avoid.
  
  

At age 15,
I had unwittingly found
a way to avoid the
humiliation of bad grades
by generating a great excuse --

"Oops, sorry,
migraine headaches,
too sick to study."

When I realized what my 15 year old inner mind was up to, I was able to avoid the humiliation of bad grades by making sure that I studied enough to get good grades!

It was almost comically simple.

Buried Benefits might be the reason why you're not moving forward in your life, even when you are really trying hard to find love, prosperity, health, fitness and happiness.  You may be holding onto your stuckness for many reasons, most of which have to do with fear:

• fear of responsibility
• fear of new situations
• fear of being seen
• fear of failure
• fear of success
• fear of being overwhelmed
• fear of being found out
• fear of losing love
• fear of being over stimulated
• fear of giving up guaranteed income
  
  

The Buried Benefit of staying stuck is that it keeps you from having to confront your fear.   (I have met more than one woman, for instance, who was afraid to get a job because it would mean letting go of spousal support.)

No one wants fear, suffering and stuckness, but, fear, suffering and stuckness can bring with it certain treasures:  safety, attention, caring, demonstration of love, protection, monetary compensation, excuses, distractions.

Once you dig up your buried benefits, you can face and release your fears, and you can reclaim your power, energy and creativity -- your hidden treasures!

         __________________________

        Mend Your Mojotivity:

         Unearth the
         HIDDEN TREASURES
         of your buried benefits
       ___________________________

If you have been trying everything to get past fear, suffering and stuckness ... to get past pain, chronic symptoms, past addictions and cravings ... then there is a good chance that Buried Benefits are part of the problem.  Exposing the concealed benefit will allow you to make better, more soul-affirming choices: like studying for the test instead of creating excuses for failing them!

The trick is to keep on asking yourself ... 

 
The answers may not pop up immediately.  You may have to persistently keep asking, especially at night, just before you fall asleep. And then, pay particular attention to what you dream that night!

When the payoff is identified, and then replaced by a more satisfying choice, the pain or problem is often spontaneously released.

_______________________________________

Sometimes, though, even when Buried Benefits are made conscious, it is still tough to let them go.   Sometimes the need for the benefit is very strong, and the payoff you get by keeping the problem feels like it outweighs what you might assume were better alternatives.

The techniques in our Mojo Bag can be of enormous help here.   These are powerful practices which go directly to the hiding places and storage spaces where Buried Benefits lurk -- in the unconscious mind, and in the energy system.